New Political System

Soon the British people will speak. A new election is in the offing (offing meaning 'soon' rather than gangland 'murder' - though come to think of it ...).

Soon we are going to be treated to the nauseous spectacle of grown men and women pretending to like us in the hope (vain in most cases) that we will elect them to spend five years of making horrible mistakes. It has begun to dawn on most of us that politicians of all shapes, sizes, creeds and persuasion (and some of them have very funny persuasions) - and not just here but in other countries too - are simply a luxury we can't afford.

Well, we say give it up! Let's invent a system which does away with politicians and replaces them with a system which is (a) cheaper and (b) which works (a concept foreign to many politicians). But more importantly, let's invent a system which actually improves over a period of time.

The world of computing in the five years since the last governemt was elected has produced computer systems which are 20 to 30 times more productive for less than half the price they were. With this in mind we think the computer companies should actually form themselves into political parties and be given their chance to run Britain plc. If this were the case we would support a system of proportional misrepresentation. One of the most immediate benefits is that political parties would stop asking us for donations. Another benefit could be that the cost of administration should fall since many ministries could be closed; for example the Foreign Office could be closed because that role could be taken over by the international sales and marketing operation of the successful company/party.

We'd like to see the election process in its present form disappear and be replaced with a 'contract governing arrangement' whereby appropriate companies would be given the franchise for say twelve months. If they didn't deliver against a range of targets we would simply appoint a new company at the end of the year. This is a process known as privatisation and should be much appreciated by most politicians who have been in favour of this concept with regard to most aspects of the British way of life.